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Power Rankings

Baltimore City Power Rankings

Photo: Illustrations by Alex Fine, License: N/A

Illustrations by Alex Fine


 

1 Fred Lazarus

It may seem odd to say that someone’s “power” goes up after they have announced their departure, but only now, as Fred Lazarus IV steps down as president of MICA after 35 years, can the enormous scope of his impact begin to be considered. Under boyish, bow-tied Lazarus, who will step down after the 2013-14 academic year, MICA more than doubled its enrollment, grew its campus tenfold and its endowment 25-fold, and moved from being a regional trade school to one of U.S. News & World Report’s top 10 art schools in the country—all of which helped launch an arts renaissance in Baltimore that has been felt from the biggest institutions to the smallest underground galleries. Baltimore owes you, sir!

2 University of Maryland’s Delta Gamma Sorority

Another academic institution didn’t fare as well this week as a U of M sorority member’s hilariously profane letter to her sisters, who are “LITERALLY being so fucking AWKWARD and so fucking BORING,” brought national attention. Reactions ranged from disgust to admiration for the sister, who has since resigned from the sorority. We’re thinking the feisty Terp might be able to motivate BPD—or to “cunt punt” some of the corrupt officers in Maryland’s jails.

3 Black Guerrilla Family

The BGF street gang has been on a power surge for years, as City Paper’s Van Smith has consistently documented. But the criminal enterprise endured an outage last week as 25 indictments came out against members, including leader Tavon White, who allegedly maintained the gang’s control over two local jails as an inmate, and 13 correctional officers, all female, including four who, collectively, bore five of White’s children. Maybe they can solve two problems by turning the jail into a daycare center.

4 O’Malley

Our governor, Martin O-my-God-do-I-want-to-be-president-Malley, has a relatively clean political record, dating back to his days as Il Mayore Numero Uno, but the BGF scandal and the system failures it represents (see story on this page) will likely leave a pretty significant ding in that record. On the other hand, all of the children the corrupt COs are having with inmates could form a significant voting bloc. Perhaps he should hold off a serious run until they turn 18?

5 Birdland

It’s been a hard week for some of the Orioles’ most faithful: Charlie Zill, the usher who entertained fans with his fiddling “Zillbilly” dance during the seventh-inning stretch, died of lung cancer this weekend, only a day before beloved Pickles Pub bartender, hot-sauce maker, and pirate Mick Kipp died of a heart attack. Death always sucks, but it has hit us especially hard this week. If there is a heaven, though, the O’s just got two more angels looking out for them.

 

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