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Political Animal

Good Times

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By Brian Morton | Posted 6/3/2009

I can't help but smile.

Sure, we're nowhere out of the weeds yet. Jobs are still hemorrhaging, gas prices have started sliding upward for the summer, North Korea is lighting matches next to their underground atomic bonfire project, the jury's still out on all the bailout money we've thrown at Wall Street, and the automakers and the entire state of California look like they're next at the payout window. But still, there remain things to laugh about.

For starters, there's the Manny, Moe, and Jack of fat, florid white politicians helming what's left of the Republican Party: Dick Cheney, Rush Limbaugh, and Newt Gingrich. The three of them are busy trying to drag America back into either the '90s (Gingrich), the '50s (Limbaugh), or the Dark Ages (Cheney), and none of them realize the long-lasting damage they are doing to the Republican Party. And you know what? Let them.

When President Obama named Sonia Sotomayor as his nominee to the Supreme Court, you would think that we hadn't had more than 200 uninterrupted years of white men on the Supreme Court, to hear Limbaugh howl about it. The list of Republicans lining up to claim that Sotomayor, a summa cum laude graduate of Princeton, was an "affirmative action" pick, is getting longer than Michael Steele's efforts to be listed in UrbanDictionary.com.

It didn't take long for Limbaugh to call Sotomayor a "reverse racist" (whatever the heck that's supposed to mean), Gingrich to tweet that she is a "Latina woman racist," or Washington pundit  and GOP water-carrier Fred Barnes to imply that she is "not the smartest." It never fails to amaze how the most privileged section of American society can get its undies in a bunch the second someone not of its number is tapped for a post of authority where he or she might have some influence over "the clique."

Black leaders in America are quite used to the mainstream media running up to them and asking them to "disavow" any idiotic statement made by another black leader; for a while, there was a cottage industry for this any time Louis Farrakhan opened his mouth. This, however, does not work in reverse. One of the closest people to an actual national leader the Republicans have right now is Senate minority leader Mitch McConnell, who this past weekend was the sole guest on CNN's State of the Union with John King.

When King asked McConnell if he'd repudiate the words of Gingrich and Limbaugh, McConnell answered, "Look. I've got a big job to do dealing with 40 Senate Republicans and trying to advance the nation's agenda, and better things to do than be the speech police over people who have their views about a very important appointment."

So while we're laughing, we might want to have a little sympathy for McConnell trying to ride herd on his shrinking caucus. Because if you think about it, if his conservative colleagues continue to smear a member of the fastest growing segment of the American populace, in a few years, he might have even fewer senators of whom to keep track.

Lastly, we can now be entertained by the squirming of the Fox News conservatives who got up in arms about the Department of Homeland Security report on violent right-wing domestic extremism. Despite years of eliminationist rhetoric on the right from the grass roots at gun shows to mainstream talk radio hosts like Michael Savage and authors like Ann Coulter, conservatives manufactured a few days of outrage that the government might actually put together a cold-eyed assessment of the chances that someone might take it all seriously. DHS also put out a report on left-wing extremism, but it's pretty obvious after the last few months that there is virtually no comparison between the two.

Look at the record: Eric Rudolph, the Olympic Park bomber, was not a liberal. Timothy McVeigh was not a liberal. Randall Terry was not a liberal. Richard Poplawski, who shot three police officers in Pittsburgh back in April, claiming Obama wants to take his guns? Probably not a liberal. Jim David Adkisson, who opened fire in a church in Tennessee last year after leaving behind a manifesto saying he wanted to kill "every Democrat in the Senate and House, the 100 people in Bernard Goldberg's book"--I'm guessing he didn't give money to public radio and subscribe to Mother Jones. And it's a safe bet that Scott Roeder, accused of killing Dr. George Tiller in church on Sunday, isn't a liberal either.

So watching the hypocrites on Fox try to wriggle away from the televised fainting fits they had barely a month ago now that right-wing domestic terrorism has once again reared its ugly head might be worth a few chuckles.

Let's be real here: Times are tough all over, and it's quite likely the grimmest might be yet to come. General Motors is bankrupt, nobody knows what's up with Pakistan's nukes, and let's not forget that Osama bin Laden is still somewhere out there waving George W. Bush's "Get Out of Jail Free" card.

But entertainment is entertainment, and you've gotta find it where you can. And if you can't laugh at the problems of the Right, who can you laugh at?

Email Brian Morton

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Leave a comment

Sobo Boyo

15 comments.

Member since 4/22/2009

"Lastly, we can now be entertained by the squirming of the Fox News conservatives who got up in arms about the Department of Homeland Security report on violent right-wing domestic extremism."

The rest of what you wrote made it seem like they were disputing that there was right-wing extremism, or that it is a problem. I don't remember specifics of the outcry (which was not just contained on Fox News), but I do know the main beef had to do with supposed links between said extremist groups and the risk of veterans joining them which were mentioned in the report, and which you completely failed to mention.

Yes the Republican Party is flopping around like a fish out of water, gasping for air while dealing with some pretty trivial issues. The only probelm is that the Democrats are desperately flailing around too, only they are doing so with trying to cope with the actual issues while they're still in the water and breathing fine. I really wish the Republicans would get their crap together so people wouldn't be focused on the soap opera that is their current status instead of something debatable. I also wish Democrats would put forth plans that include more than just price tags so that they can be debated too.

And if they do put forth a plan (either party), how about actually reading the damn thing before signing off? It boggles my mind that we passed a several hundred page stimulus plan with less than 24 hours to read over it. Didn't we get in the whole housing/loan mess by people not reading the fine print?

Report this comment Posted 6.8.2009 1:30 PM

Charles

416 comments.

Member since 1/11/2007

Why doesn't City Paper save some money and just publish the DNC Weekly Talking Points instead of paying Morton to re-word them?

Report this comment Posted 6.9.2009 12:12 PM

DW

166 comments.

Member since 6/25/2008

Well it's been a couple of weeks since one Reich wingnut murdered a man in church. and then there's the 88 year old reichwing killer who opened fire in the Holocaust museum. So it seems funny in a darkly perverse kind of way to see yet more NeoCon hypocrisy on display as Sobo whines about how unfair it is to be concerned with Reich wing efforts to recruit from the military. The past year has been quite eventful in the oh so many FAUX News victims who have grabbed their guns and gone a killing.

Report this comment Posted 6.17.2009 10:55 AM

Sobo Boyo

15 comments.

Member since 4/22/2009

DB, wtf whining are you talking about? Pointing out a missing piece of information is hypocritical too? Who said they shouldn't be concerned about extremist groups? The issue, as I recall, was that vets were more likely and susceptable to join, not that they were targetted by said groups. No one (of those you're attacking) is defending the morons who have committed the brutal, senseless acts of the past few weeks, nor any other time.

Clean the sand from your vag and stop the bitter knee jerk, they're always wrong, elitist outlook when dealing with people who have different views from you.

Report this comment Posted 6.17.2009 12:59 PM

DW

166 comments.

Member since 6/25/2008

SB, you recall incorrectly. The recihwing seeks to recruit vets because...they have training as soldiers. Duh. and of course the right got their collective panties in a bunch over the mere suggestion that they or anyone associated with them would do any such thing. Untill of course the reality of Reichwing nuttery exposed itself yet again. But what do you expect for a bunch that spews hate speak 24/7 and then pretends to be shocked, shocked i say, when the weaker minded members of their ilk succumb to the broadcast incentives to kill in the name of jesus, or whatever rational they take with them. So yes, Morton nailed it when he mentions FAUX News and the neocons took offense at what in hindsight looks to be a very asstute assessment of reichwing machinations.

Report this comment Posted 6.20.2009 11:38 PM

Charles

416 comments.

Member since 1/11/2007

Look everyone, our DNC Brownshirt is back! I see you stop taking your meds again.

BTW, James W. von Brunn was a socialist, hated Bush and hated Fox News, so you two have a lot in common.

Report this comment Posted 6.21.2009 3:13 AM

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